Bliss of Life

Since I’ve been in Houston, I haven’t had any prenatal care.  My midwife in Austin sent me a list of midwives in Houston, and I found one that is pretty close to my in-laws house. Because of the circumstances, I didn’t want to schedule the appointment for later in the week–I just don’t know what tomorrow has in store. Thankfully, she was able to see me the same day. And guess what? Everything is just fine with the Little Mung Bean. In fact, the baby has grown so much she was even able to tell without any trouble whatsoever that the baby is head down with her back against the left side of my uterous, which is the most ideal position for birth.

The waiting is over, in a sense. Ben’s mother’s health is not improving, but we are blessed to have her at home, where we will celebrate the remaining days of her life. This is an emotional time for everyone, and yet, we are so grateful that we can grant her request to be at home with her family.

We are in Houston right now. We’ve been here since the wee hours of Wednesday morning. Ben’s mom, Alice, who has battled multiple sclerosis for nearly 20 years, is in the hospital with pneumonia. Ben’s sister, Lisa, and his dad, Vinyoo, are with us at her bedside, as is Toi, her beloved caretaker who has been with her for the past 8 years. Her infection appears to be clearing up, but we are waiting to see if she regains kidney function. We should know more in the coming days.

I have nine weeks to go until I reach my due date, and while I realize that the due date is arbitrary (the baby has her own due date in mind) I still feel my breath catch when I look at the baby counter on the side of this site. There are so many things to do still, like I need bigger bras, nursing pads, giant sanitary napkins, to finish painting the bookshelf in the baby’s room, and the list goes on. There are also the birthing fears I still need to slay, like my fear of having a prolonged labor and becoming too exhausted to give birth at home. I am afraid that my blood sugar will become unstable and I’ll need to go to the hospital. I am afraid of going to the hospital. I am afraid of having an epidural. I am afraid of not having a say in my own care and that either myself or the baby will suffer some sort of health repercussions from being over treated.

I would like to transform all these fears before I go into labor, but I realize that it might just take me being in the middle of my labor, exhausted and fed up with the nonsense of fear to actually let some of these fears go. I can’t be sure about that right now. All I know is that I have approximately 9 weeks to work on releasing them. In the meantime, I try not to visualize the birth happening in specific way, because no matter what happens, the end result will be me holding the most precious being I have ever seen in my arms. And I still know in my soul that we will be both be fine. So even if I don’t slay all my birthing fears before I go into labor, I am choosing, with every breath and every tear, not to live in these fears.

Last night, I slept 10 hours straight! It was heavenly. I had some weird dreams about teaching a yoga class in which no one wanted to follow my instructions. I’ve been having doubts about teaching once the baby is born. The way I see it, there are a lot of teachers out there who have already picked up where I left off. I may just want to focus on the baby for awhile, because Mother is the first teacher.

Anyway, I woke up feeling a little more relaxed about yesterday’s appointment with my midwife. I also found this great website that talks about different techniques to get the baby to rotate. I also talked to a friend of mine who has done a lot of work with pregnant women in her holistic practice. She reminded me that there is still plenty of time and that my midwife is just taking preventative measures. Most babies turn on their own if they can, meaning as long as the umbilical cord is not preventing them from turning or the placenta is not in the way. So I’ve decided that I’ll put off making another ultrasound appointment until after I see my midwife again, which is a little over a week from now. In the mean time, I’m adding a lot inversions in the form of adho mukha svanasana (downward dog) and salamba sirsasana (headstand) to my yoga practice, which is supposed to help even out the uterus so the baby can rotate more easily.

I stopped including salamba sirasana in my asana practice early in my pregnancy because it felt like all my organs were cramming into my sternum every time I started to go upside down. Now that most of my organs are actually crammed under my sternum, it feels fine. But I can’t imagine what it looks like to see a huge pregnant woman standing on her head, kind of like a hippo doing a cartwheel. Not the type of gravity defying act you see everyday.

Also, in our efforts to get the Little Mung Bean to turn, if she hasn’t already. (The baby feels like a she to me, so I’m just going with that pronoun for now.) Ben is talking to the bottom of my belly and more walking, of course. My plan is to do what I can to coax the baby to rotate, if she hasn’t yet. And if my midwife still isn’t able to grab on to a head or a foot when she palpates on my belly at our next appointment, then I’ll make an appointment for an ultrasound. I would rather make every effort I can to turn the baby before having another ultrasound. That way, I get to be proactive too.

Here is a great timeline for breech babies from the Spinning Babies website:

Breech timeline
Before 31 weeks

Breech is not unusual, nor to be worried about. Do the Inversion for 20-30 seconds a day, that’s seconds, not minutes. This will help your uterine ligaments become more balanced and symmetrical so that baby can more easily flip head down by 31-32 weeks.

Between 31 and 32 weeks

Most babies are head down now. This is when I suggest beginning some exercises at home to help your baby flip on his or her own. I don’t suggest manipulating the baby manually because there is a small chance of the cord being tugged. I do suggest body work, home exercises and talking to your baby – even have a loved one talk through a paper tube or the tube of the vacuum cleaner (detached from the vacuum of course!). Put the tube on the mother’s lower right abdomen and talk through it. The baby can be quite interested in a familiar loved one’s voice becoming more clear in this way. We want the baby head down and facing the mother’s right hip, so that is why we place the tube there.

Between 32 and 34 weeks

The baby is usually still small enough to flip if the lower uterus and sacrum are lined up symmetrically. Body work is worth paying for if you have done 1-2 weeks of inversions and abdominal and sacral releases without success yet. Don’t give up. Its too early to worry, but it is time to do something!

Between 35 and 36 weeks

If your baby is breech during this time your doctor or midwife will begin to talk about how to help baby flip head down and possibly about scheduling a manual version for 36-37 weeks.

Getting bodywork and having acupuncture or homeopathy will help soften the ligaments and a tense uterus to either help the baby flip spontaneously or to allow more success in an attempt at a version.

36-37 weeks

During this time, you can continue with the suggestions in the “Professional Helpers for Fetal Positioning” article. You may also agree to go through with a cephalic version (the doctor manually turns the baby head down through your abdominal wall). I suggest getting Chiropractic, myofascial and acupuncture, homeopathy or moxibustion (or all) before the version. Financially this may not be possible, I realize. But see what you can do. Inversions on stairs with a friend to “spot” you (make sure you don’t fall) are free and effective.

38-40 weeks

Sometimes a woman and her caregivers don’t know the baby is breech until this late. Rarely a baby flips breech this late in pregnancy. It may be the bio-physical ultrasound exam that discovers the baby is breech.

A version may yet be tried and depending on the fluid level and the flexibility of the uterus, baby’s head position and location, uterine septums, where the placenta is, etc. the version may yet succeed.

If not, a cesarean may be scheduled.

Some women will seek help for a vaginal birth. One of the factors in assessing the safety of breech vaginal birth is a baby that is born between 32 and 40 weeks. Of course, before 36 weeks the baby is too premature to be born other than at a hospital with a special care nursery.

The Sandman has been avoiding me lately. Last night, me and the baby were up until the wee hours of the morning, waiting for the jittery sensation in my limbs to pass, so I could get to sleep. I used the time to start another knitting project–a hat for the Little Mung Bean. It will be the second one I’ve made for the baby.

Anyway, today was my follow up appointment with my midwife, and once again, she couldn’t really get a grip on any baby parts when she palpated around on my belly. I relaxed my stomach as much as I could, but it’s almost an involuntary reaction to tense up when I feel someones hands diving into the depths of my abdomen. She had me exhale a couple times before she palpated in certain areas, but that didn’t seem to help. Since she can only go by where I feel the baby’s movements and where the heart beat is loudest, she has a lingering question about the position of the baby. I told her that yesterday the baby had hiccups, which I felt in the lower left area of my belly. She seemed reassured, kind of. I think she is less certain about the position because I feel movement on both sides of my belly, even the side that the baby is laying on. I’m pretty sure that the baby has turned, and that our Little Mung Bean is just super wiggly. We have the video to prove it. So when she suggested an ultrasound, I was surprised. To be fair, she did say that an ultrasound would be more for her peace of mind than for me. So I don’t know. I’ll have to mull it over.

I’ve spent most of the day in bed. To say that my feet hurt is an understatement. The past few days I’ve had tingly pins-and-needles sensations on the bottom and top my feet before I even get out of bed in the morning. So I’m taking a load off today. I may end up going for a short walk, just so I can get some sleep tonight. Unfortunately, when I don’t go for a walk I end up staying awake half the night due to restless leg syndrome, which is common during this stage of pregnancy. For me, RLS is not just isolated in my legs. It’s in my arms and fingers too. Last night, I sat in bed twitching and turning until after 3 am. I know this is all part of the third trimester, and I am officially in it. On the bright side, my back feels a little better.

Tonight we have our third conscious birthing class with Lanell, who will be our doula for the Little Mung Bean’s birth–something we decided on over the weekend. So I’m looking forward to our class and getting to share space with other pregnant woman.

Had another appointment with my midwife today. Everything seems to be on track, but due to my excessively strong stomach muscles (hee hee) she wasn’t able to feel the baby’s head at the base of my uterus when she poked around on my belly. (It’s really amazing how much she can feel just by touching the outside of my abdomen.) She used the doppler to find the heart beat, followed by a stethoscope to locate where the heart beat is loudest. It is loudest at the base of my belly on the right side. But she wants to be extra sure that the baby is still head down (if it isn’t, now is the time to get the baby to rotate), so I have another appointment on Thursday. She says that the baby will be bigger by then, which means that my abs of steel shouldn’t be a problem. I’m not worried. I can tell that baby is upside down and laying on the right side of my body. But I think that at least one of the baby’s legs is extended, rather than bent, which would mean that what I thought was an elbow, might actually be a heel. No biggie.

In other news, Ben just finished his quarter for school. Yay!  We get to spend the whole weekend goofing off! OK, maybe not the whole weekend there is still a lot of that needs to be done to the house, but most of it.